r.i.p. scrunchy, best.dog.ever.

[I will preface this by saying that I've decided not to share the gory details of Scrunchy's last hours that I unfortunately witnessed in the middle of the night of June 15, which incidentally happened to be both Father's Day and my parents' 33rd wedding anniversary. Instead I'm going to focus on what an awesome dog she was.]

I've pretty much always believed I was a dog in some past life. My first word, as the story goes, was: Dog-gie, as my mom pushed me down the pet food aisle in a grocery cart. At the time, my parents had a pug, who they rescued as an adult dog (age 4) from an abusive home. Her name was Bridget, and although she was pretty skittish around most people, she loved me and let me jump all over her.

Unfortunately, after getting hit by a car once and getting burned by a tailpipe a different time, going blind, and bleeding all over the house, she had to be put to sleep when she was 12.

Before pugs were trendy, our family got a pug. I still vividly remember the day Scrunchy entered our lives. It was November of 1993, a few weeks before my 11th birthday. I was in fifth grade and just starting to need help with my math homework. My dad diligently worked with me every night, but this night, instead of sitting in our usual seats at the kitchen table, he suggested we move into the living room and work on solving algebra on the couch. When a pair of headlights turned into our cul-de-sac, I didn't think anything of it. Then the doorbell rang. I ran behind my dad to the door, and I'm not sure I've ever been so successfully and awesomely surprised as I was in that moment. Staring back at me was a tiny pug puppy in the arms of a man. For awhile we chased her around calling her "Puppy" because no one could think of a good name. Then one day my dad suggested Scrunchy. He still to this day claims that had he known a scrunchie was an actual object, he would have never named her that. But she lived up to her name and "scrunched" her way into everyone's hearts.

For a brief moment in time, I shot up the popularity scale because Nick's family, who lived in the neighborhood, wanted to get a pug. And they did the following summer. He brought Tessa over on his skateboard with Blake, who had always been one of the most popular boys. It was the only time I hung out with Blake in my life (both before and after), even though I'd known him since kindergarten (he never forgave me for missing a day of kindergarten to go to the Bozo Show and forever had a blimp-sized ego).


Nick and I didn't really talk again until senior year of high school when we had a creative writing class together. I asked him to the turn-about dance and he brought over Tessa. Both she and Scrunch ended up in our pictures.

I texted Nick, who now lives in Hawaii, to give him the bad news about Scrunch and he responded, "So did Tessa a few weeks back." I hope the saying's true that All Dogs Go To Heaven and that the two of them have been reunited in the afterlife.

Scrunchy represented a time when everyone got along and the world was a simple place. The only thing that's remained constant is that Scrunch remained everyone's favorite, everyone's go-to "person." Dogs are so much better than people, "man's" best friend. They are loyal and trusting and never stab you in the back or stop loving you.
So in honor of the best dog ever, here are some favorite memories and favorite photographs from the past 15 years...
*She had nicer things than me: a Liz Claiborne collar with a Jewish star charm
*Every three years since I was born, my dad insisted we take a professional family portrait, so that my sister, who is three years younger than me, is the same age as I was in the one before. In the first photo, it's my mom, dad, me and Bridget. Ever since Scrunch came into our lives, she's been in every photo since (i think 5 total). Here's the most recent taken last December.

*We taught her Yiddish. For instance, instead of teaching her "paw," we taught her "Good Shabbas"
*Most people would describe a docile creature as he/she "wouldn't hurt a fly." Well, in Scrunchy's case that's the only thing she ever did hurt. Whenever there was a fly buzzing against the back glass sliding door, it'd drive her crazy and she'd stand on her hind legs and smash the flying bug with her paw. Then she'd eat it. She was more tolerant of other insects, though, as can be seen by one of my all-time favorite pictures. I took in an injured monarch butterfly, who I named Grace. Even Scrunchy was captivated by her beauty.

*She's appeared in two page-a-day calendars dedicated to dogs. Here's one of the photos. The other showed her wearing a hot pink feather boa.

*When my uncle died in October of 2000 it was like she knew what happened and kept me company while I sat at home alone, crying. She curled up with me and licked my tears.
*Some of my friends nicknamed her "Bojangles" and tried to get her drunk on New Years Eve of '00/'01 when I threw a party while my parents were out of town...that is until I found out and banned them from being near her the rest of the evening.
*She would always try and run away every time the door opened, causing us to run all over the neighborhood yelling her name. One time when we spent New Years Eve at a family friends' house in Glenview, we thought we lost her for good.
*She loved chewing playing cards, make-up, pens, hair...
*When the dog named Brandy, who lived in the house whose backyard backed up to ours with a fence between, died, Scrunch cried every time someone said her name. It's like she knew she would never run back and forth along the fence with her again. Luckily she went deaf by the time Holly (my best friend's dog who was Scrunchy's best friend) died last December, otherwise she may have gone into a depression.
*She was so stubborn when I'd try and take her on walks and I'd usually get jerked backwards when she'd give up and sit down in the middle of a crosswalk. More times than not, I ended up carrying her the remainder of our "walk."
*Every time someone opened the dishwasher and the dishes were dirty, she'd jump onto the door and lick as much as she could before someone closed it again. Also, she loved to try and get whatever food was closest to the edge of the table when we'd eat meals because she could just reach the table top with the nails of her front paws. Although, we'd try and tell her "No!" she never stopped and eventually it became adorable to see her smushed face peeping over.


*She loved sitting on my mom's lap every morning while she drank her coffee and licking my dad's sweaty legs whenever he finished exercising on his stationary bike.

[the above picture was taken on Scrunchy's last night]
*She had a security "blanket" we called her powder puff, which she would run and retrieve any time anyone entered the house. She was such a good little greeter. Over the years the toy lost its puff, but she still carried it wherever she went, and on her final night I got it for her since she didn't have enough strength to get it herself, which is when the below picture was taken.


Here are some more of my favorite photos...


[scrunching her way into Jenny's text book]


[one of my favorite pictures-and it wasn't even posed]


[cracking up with her sisters at the annual pug party]


[the above two pictures are two pictures from my first-ever black&white roll of film...my Bubby is in the background of the first one]

[my dad took this a few years ago when we fell asleep together on my bed]

[a picture i took in my first darkroom photo class senior year of high school. my friend, pat, did all the stuff around the photo]


[one of my favorite hilarious photos...this was taken after Carrie and I came back to my house at 4 a.m. after prom and immediately hit up the ice cream and cheesecake. Clearly, Scrunch thought she was going to join in the food fest.]

[my favorite self-portrait]

We went out for dinner the night of the 15th to celebrate Father's Day and their anniversary. My dad insisted we all get an alcoholic beverage and then proceeded to toast the dog--To our pet, our friend, our sister, our daughter, you were a great dog. We all clinked glasses and said, "Cheers."

For more pictures of Scrunch since I got a digital camera two years ago, click HERE

E.B.G.=Eccentric Bike Gang

It is 1:17 in the morning after a long Sunday of activities. Where did I just come from you ask? I successfully rode my bike home all the way from the Planetarium! Why was I at the Planetarium? Just acting as part of a bike gang for a student film. Pretty much how I conclude every weekend.

Honestly, after quitting Bike the Drive after only doing 10 of the 30 miles a few weeks ago, I thought my biking career had ended and Caliente, my 15-year-old rusting Schwinn would have to retire.


My knees hurt so badly that instead of completing the south route with my mom (who hadn't ridden a bicycle in 30 years) and her friend, Rob, I stood front and center for American English's (a Beatles cover band) entire two-hour set. By myself. And I have a nasty one-shoulder sunburn to prove it. It was the closest I'll ever get to seeing the actual Beatles, so I sang my heart out to every word and even went a little dance-crazy when they performed "Twist and Shout"


BTD '08 Photos
BTD '07 Photos

So, as I stated, I thought I would never be able to bike again. Instead I agreed to being part of a bad-ass bike gang named the Argonauts (based off some Vonnegut novel...a writer I've embarrassingly never read before) for a Depaul student film. Our first shoot was last Wednesday night and we shot underneath Lake Shore Drive just south of Navy Pier.
Unplanned fireworks burst into the sky over Lake Michigan and we all pedaled our bikes down the pier, whooping with excitement like a bunch of caffeinated ten-year-olds. "This is kind of magical," I said to one of my gang members, who I had previously been talking to about yoga and hair salons (obviously we're very gang-like). Who knew one could access such view-friendly locales during after-hours. I sure didn't.

I thought biking to Navy Pier from Ukranian Village Wednesday night was quite a feat, but tonight takes the cake--University Village to Navy Pier to Planetarium to Wicker Park.
During tonight's shoot as we slowly made our way down the lakeside path, Kalyn told anyone we passed, "We're an eccentric bike gang." I thought it was hilarious and eventually deemed ourselves no longer the Argonauts, but the E.B.G. She got a few great reactions from people; one man even broke into giggles.
Here's something I learned being an extra. The director doesn't actually have any idea how long a shoot will last, so any time given is irrelevant. Lying on the concrete with the Field Museum in front, the Shedd Aquarium to the left, the lake behind and the Big Dipper above, I decided to chill out and not worry about time (Does anybody really know what time it is/Does anybody really care/About time..."). Police on bikes were arresting three men just a few feet away from us. I'm still not sure why.

When we finally made it to the Planetarium beach to film the conclusion of the feuding gang race, we made it just in time to get kicked off the beach by a slow-moving cop car who announced through a megaphone that the beach was closed for the night. None of us had eaten, and we all retreated onto the museum boulevard, pining after our promised sandwiches and PBRs. Chessa held us over by generously dispensing slices of her homemade sandwiches, though, which I devoured like I hadn't eaten in weeks.

I rode home with Shelly, Kalyn, and Angelia, dreaming about and salivating at the thought of downing a fountain Coke. I know, I know, a normal person would dream of h2o, but not this gangster. Usually I quench my thirst with chocolate milk or cranberry juice, but every now and then a fountain Coke really hits the spot. Something about the carbonation. Realizing that nothing nothing stays open past 10 in this damn city, Shelly and I in unison brainstormed: WENDY'S!
Kayln, a few bike lengths ahead of us, stopped at a red light alongside 3 motorcyclists. As Shelly and Angelia pulled up alongside her, she delivered her, "We're an eccentric bike gang" line and I vowed (yet again) to never leave home without a camera. Could there be more hilarious of a site than seeing 3 meatheads with no sense of humor waiting to peel away from 3 corresponding crazies claiming to be in a vintage Schwinn gang?
A few blocks further on our adventure to hipsterville the air grew much warmer away from the lakefront, and I took off my jacket and my dad's button down plaid long-sleeved shirt (hot, i know) and tied them both around my waist. "Your shirt fell off," a guy with his friend outside a bar called out to me. At first I thought they were saying something derogatory until i looked down and realized my hoodie had in fact fallen onto Grand Avenue back about fifty yards. Oops. I planted my bike on its kickstand and shuffled over to pick up my discarded clothes. "Thanks!" I said to the man as I walked back, embarrassed.

At Wendy's we dutifully waited in line behind a car in the drive-thru. When we approached the order here speaker, we said what we wanted, but instead of the voice thanking us and instructing us to proceed to the first window, he said, "Are you on bikes?" Yeah, so? "You have to be in a car, we can't serve you." The adolescent angst crept up from my junior high storage unit as I defiantly complained about bike-prejudiced people. Logical solution: Call Chessa to come drive us through the drive-thru. She jumped at the chance to be part of the prank and showed up a few minutes later in her station wagon. As we waited for her we discussed opening a healthy fast food joint that would only serve cyclists and that would turn away anyone in a vehicle. When Chessa arrived, one by one we rode alongside her open passenger window and shouted our orders through the two windows into the speaker. The man accused us of already trying to order, but Chessa insisted she had just gotten there and we were all her roommates. At last! We finally got our french fries and fountain Cokes. We had to split the fries, though, because they forgot to give us one. At that point I didn't care anymore. I rode the rest of the way by myself down Milwaukee with my insanely biggie Coke, every now and then throwing a fry into my mouth.

My two-year gig as a driver ends in August, and I'm already worried about not having the funds to ever own/fuel a vehicle again once I have to hand over the keys to "my" beloved Volvo. But I have to say, after tonight, I'm pretty psyched about reintroducing Caliente into my daily routine.

[Ordinarily I have Sundays and Mondays off, but I worked today and was asked yesterday if I could work Monday...so I should probably get to sleep so that I can safely transport the kid to school in five hours. Maybe I'll tell him to ride his bike there...]

This post is outdated now, but where one door closes another opens...I, believe it or not, didn't take any pictures during the filming, but the talented Francesca (Chessa) Gagliano just posted Polaroids she took. So I'll just pretend that that's why it took so long to press "Publish Post." Enjoy.

spring ignites the crazies

While I was walking the dogs to pick up Max from guitar yesterday, I was talking to my sister on the phone, while trying to walk Axel and Nola (two huge, lovable, well-trained German Shepherds...who also try and kill every dog in their path). My sister was talking very loudly, denying that she was drunk, despite participating in an outdoor, campus-wide MayFest party. "You wouldn't even believe it! It's crazy here!" "I don't know," I replied. "I've seen a lot of crazy things."
And sure enough, up ahead a few yards a man stood on the sidewalk holding a leash attached to a cat. "And now people walk cats. How's that for crazy," I said to her. Call me crazy, but to me that's crazier than college kids drinking, which is about as common as, say, a dog on a leash.

I arrived at Avenue N Guitars and waited outside with the dogs, propping myself up onto the window ledge. Nola dutifully sat on the stoop staring into the shop, not letting anyone enter or exit unless she saw it was Max. Axel stood on the sidewalk, his tongue hanging out, staring at people with his big head and crooked face (permanent damage from a bad middle ear infection last summer). Oh and he wears booties on his back feet now to prevent the nails, which have worn all the way down to his paw, from bleeding. People walking by laughed at his shoes or whispered about the size of his head. Then. A small, old man rode by on a bike in the street and yelled, "TAKE YOUR PANTS OFF!" Not even in a suggestive, perverse manner either. He seemed to be quite angry that I was wearing pants.

Max came out from his lesson (20 minutes late) and I said, "I feel like I'm in the Twilight Zone right now," and recounted the cat and cyclist. And as if the universe wanted to prove my point even further, just then two woman jogged around us, wearing matching gear and voicing the rhythms of their runs-"BUM BUM. BUM BUM." Training for a synchronized running team? Max and I looked at each other and laughed with questioning eyebrows.

When we got home I went up to my apartment to read on the couch, which nestles between three (almost) floor-to-ceiling windows. As I desperately tried to catch up on my New Yorkers, I heard an amplified bicycle honk from outside followed by some chanting. I looked out and saw 6 (or 7?) people on some kind of boat-sized bicycle contraption slowly pedaling up and down Leavitt. Every few feet one of the guys chanted something into a megaphone. I thought I heard "Obama" mentioned, but I could have been hearing things.

Then, while in the backyard (which is actually a side yard) throwing a Frisbee with Max, we saw three girls in the new adorable corner park that just opened across the street from our house, who looked like witches. And I'm not being influenced by my reading material, as I have not yet started The Golden Compass, due to never having time to stay on top of the weekly New Yorkers (of which I received TWO this week!?)

So i decided to join in the craziness and run around like a madwoman today getting supplies for my upcoming art show and managed to blow through my entire paycheck. I am now subsequently broke, as I have been before every art show. I also bought new aviator sunglasses, proving once again that I was born in the wrong generation, seeing as the only sunglasses that didn't look horrible on me incidentally make me look like a 70s porn star (or Jim Morrison?).

Oh, and I chopped off my hair. Well, I didn't, but my brilliant stylist, Vanessa (seriously--she'll change your life--Salon Lorrene in Palatine) did. And as you can see I am now sporting somewhat of a funky "Jew fro," just in time for the Passover season, which p.s.--speaking of crazy--is driving me insane! It's my own fault because I went a month without grocery shopping (I do 4 other people's grocery shopping, yet can't find time to do my own. Figure that one out.) and decided the best time to remedy the empty-fridge syndrome was the same day that Passover began at sunset. So I filled an entire basket of yummy things from around the world at Trader Joe's--Mexican, Indian, Italian, etc.--and can't eat ANY of it until Sunday at sundown! This made me question my belief system because I realized that the only two Jewish traditions I participate in (besides lighting the menorah) involve starving myself (no flour for 8 days of Passover and no food/drink for 24 hours of Yom Kippur). This doesn't really make any sense because I don't believe in God and I very strongly believe in eating.

Also, I was thinking today after marveling at the cloudless sky and 75-degree sun--Do people in "paradise climates" (such as southern California) appreciate nice weather? Because, my thought process continued, today explains why I love living in Chicago. I enjoy a challenging/spontaneous climate. It Keeps life interesting and doesn't allow taking for granted beautiful days like this one. Thank you, Mother Nature.

in memory of julie carpenter (1932-2008)

I tried but I honestly can’t remember what I did on Christmas Day any of the years prior to the first time I joined Carrie's family in 1994. My only memories of Christmas involve long car rides with the Lullos playing carols on the radio and Grandma scurrying to welcome us into her home, always a hug leftover for Carrie’s little Jewish friend. I had just turned 12 and Carrie and I had become inseparable best friends over the past year. Being the token Jew of the school, she and her parents graciously invited me to join her mom’s side of the family up in Wisconsin on her parents’ farm.
I don't remember much from that first Christmas except a lot people radiating a lot of positive energy, a lot of food and a lot of kids. Carrie’s cousin, Mary, was only a month old and Carrie kept insisting I hold her. Babies have always made me uncomfortable, so I just as insistently refused the responsibility of holding such a tiny human life.

Over the years Carrie’s grandparents became my surrogate grandparents. My first grandpa didn’t even get to see me pass first grade. Both of grandmas missed my high school graduation by less than a year, and my other grandpa passed away three months before I graduated college. Every year they’d give me gifts like I was just another one of their many grandchildren and made me feel like I wasn't just there because I had nowhere else to go but that I was there because I was part of the family.

Grandma declared Christmas '06 the last one she planned to host. I made sure Carrie and I took a picture with her grandparents before we left to document the end of an era.

Eerily soon after, Grandma was diagnosed with pancreatic cancer and spent all of 2007 battling the disease with all her strength and devotion. Carrie's parents hosted Christmas '07. Grandma looked thinner and seemed a little less energetic, but she was nevertheless still her sassy, lovable self.

On February 17 of this year I drove Carrie up to Burlington to visit her Grandma (her grandparents moved to a lake house about 8 years ago), who was lying on a hospital bed in the middle of the living room. I contemplated the word as I entered the space, standing on the floor where I’ve spent so many Christmases. Living Room. Is this one of life’s ironies? I thought.
Carrie motioned for me to hold Grandma’s hand. Unlike so many years before when I refused to hold Mary, afraid of dropping her and ruining my chances of ever returning, this time I knew I had to offer my hand. It was the least I could do. Instead of fearing holding on, I feared letting go. I stroked Grandma’s fingers. Remarkably soft and bony. She could barely open her eyes, but she nodded when someone asked if she recognized me.
I excused myself to use the bathroom and almost started crying. All these memories of Grandma flooded back to me, starting with the time Carrie and I, as pre-teens, had returned from exploring their many acres of land and I went to the bathroom, only to have a tick fall out of my underwear. Subsequently Grandma carefully checked my hair for any more lingering blood-sucking insects.

--Grandma having serious conversations with me about my photography career path, giving me advice to join a newspaper. “They’re the best photographers,” she always reminded me. She was always the artist, though. I have a collection of “reject” paintings that she let Carrie and I keep that I will treasure forever.

--Grandma playing our annual game of Charades and having to act out “The Thong Song.”

--Grandma giving extra love and attention to her autistic granddaughter, Hannah.


--When my own mom was diagnosed with cancer back in the June of 2002, I spent my whole first summer break from college driving her to doctor appointments and spending hours visiting the hospital after she had a lung removed. Grandma Carpenter made it clear that she was looking out for me, and before I went back to school in the fall invited me up to Burlington for a little R&R. Not just me, though. She extended the invitation to my younger sister, Sheri, as well. Sheri and I spent the afternoon with Carrie and Grandma on the lake riding waverunners, enjoying the final days of summer. For those few hours I allowed myself to live in the present and fully appreciate the weather and the company of my best friend, my only sister and my surrogate grandmother.

[me and Carrie on the waverunner, her cousins Erin and Mary on the pier]

[me and Sheri]
When I came out of the bathroom I sat on the floor of what I decided should more appropriately be called the Family Room, a room that lived up to its name. The sounds of the Daytona 500 filled the room and replaced the gunshots of the old Westerns, which had previously been on TV, serving as a distraction for Grandpa.
Across the room Clyde, their chocolate lab, started chewing a paper towel. Grandpa scolded him from his position on the couch. Not wanting to make Grandpa get up, I crawled over to the dog and reached to grab the shredded mess. Clyde responded by biting my hand with three sharp teeth. I didn’t get mad at him, despite the throbbing pain. It was proof of reality. This is happening and this is happening now.
Grandma called for her husband in a stunted whisper, "Neal, Neal..." He dutifully walked over and sat beside his childhood love and took her hand in his. What killed me was then hearing Grandma saying something no one else could hear and Grandpa responding in a normal voice, "You want a hug? Ok." And he stood up and pressed his body against her frail frame.
It was hard to leave because deep down I knew that was probably the last time I'd see her.

On March 2, while waiting for a flight back to Chicago from Kansas City, I received a message from Carrie saying her grandma passed away that morning.

I am so grateful for all your compassion and generosity, Grandma. Thank you for being an unforgettable presence in my life. I'll miss you.

funniest snl in a long time

Last Saturday night SNL returned after a 2+-month-long writers' strike hiatus. Due to my feverish state, I stayed in and watched the new episode. Despite how miserable I felt, I still couldn't help laughing out loud at times. They were the kind of skits that made me wish I still worked there

(yep, that's a polaroid of me, standing in for Lorne Michaels towards the end of the '04/'05 season)

...and I'll tell you one other thing that makes me wish I still worked there--Ellen Page and WILCO are hosting tomorrow night's show!! I could be holding a light meter under Jeff Tweedy's chin as I type this...

Here are my two favorites from the 2/23/08 show:



(for the full-length skit, click HERE)

Wilco Winter Residency, Day 5 (a.k.a. What happens Thursday?)

(*NOTE*: My apologies for taking so long to complete the final recap...I started writing this Thursday and by Friday came down with the flu, which I'm still trying to get over...)

It's taken me 24 hours to process last night's conclusion to what Greg Kott coined, "Wilco-palooza," but here it goes.
In anticipation of the final night, I purposely refrained from looking up which songs Wilco had not played yet. I couldn't think of any off the top of my head, so I thought it'd be fun to be surprised if there were any left. Not only was this the grand finale but I was supposed to go with friends again. Abbey had our two tickets and we planned to meet Shilpa there. Unfortunately, though, Abbey got sick in the middle of the day and decided against going. She and I both sent out texts to our other Wilco fan friends. Our mutual friend, Lindsay (who was there Saturday), decided to skip class for the night and spend the time instead enjoying the lovely sounds of our favorite band.
Shilpa had to pick her ticket up from will-call, so she got there early and stood in line in the freezing cold, subsequently allowing her to save us seats, sixth row center. Turns out it was the same row I'd sat in the the past two nights with Amy and Steve. And guess who happened to be sitting behind us--Amy and Steve!
Frank E. Lee from XRT introduced the band tonight, saying, "Wilco is playing as good as any band in the world right now!"

1) Sunken Treasure (repeat)--I love the harmonica.
2) One By One--during this mellow tune, the girl taking down orders/carrying drinks around was yelling out names of beers to potential customers
3) Shouldn't Be Ashamed
4) You Are My Face (repeat)--the annoying people receiving all the beer wouldn't sit down, which annoyed those (us) who actually wanted to sit and relax during the slower songs. "They should be pushed," Lindsay said.
5) Side With The Seeds (repeat)

"How you doin'?" Jeff asked the packed theater. "Are you tired?" I answered "YES" but it got lost among all the overly-enthused "NOs!" "No, we're not tired," Jeff said. "We are en-er-gized. We've been swingin' two bats in the on-deck circle all week--I don't know what that means--do they still do that?" (???) "Ok, we've been taking human growth hormones all week."

6) Pot Kettle Black (repeat)
7) War On War (repeat)
8) Pieholden Suite--Nels Cline simultaneously played the banjo and tambourine
"We get asked to play that song a lot, but we don't play it often...because we don't have the Total Prose [the horn trio...who I've been informed is actually the Total PROS...i.e. PROfessionals]

9) Muzzle Of Bees (repeat)
10) It's Just That Simple (repeat)--John Stirratt got just as huge and deserving a reaction from the crowd as he did on Saturday night. I recorded most of the beautiful song, but unfortunately had to stop just before the end because the stupid security man was on the prowl again. I saw him checking out some girl's device in the row in front of mine and got nervous. Enjoy:

11) Nothingsevergonnastandinmyway (repeat)

"This song will be the last off of A.M.," Jeff said. "I have to be honest--you can go get a soda during this song. This song is dogshit, man. It's the worst song...it's the worst song ever. I just have to be honest with you, so go pee, take it easy, put your feet up, don't pay attention--this is a contractual obligation."
12) I Thought I Held You--he mocked himself through the entire song, even going so far as to mime the lyrics--love it.
"Did you enjoy that?" Cheers. "That's because these guys [motioned to the band] are good. Thanks fellas for polishing that turd. Showbiz should be more honest, don't you think? I'd like it on American Idol if someone came out and said, 'Look I didn't really rehearse this at all. I suck.'"

13) What Light--Lindsay and I discussed on the drive to The Riv how annoying it is that people only know this song (because it's the only one the radio played for awhile from SBS before they finally started playing "Walken") and how a lot of people interpret the song to be about god.
"Watch," I said to Lindsay when the song started. "Everyone's going to sing this one." Sure enough, I was right.
Lindsay responded, "That's cause they think it's church." Haha!

"If you've been to all the shows, we're really close to being done with all the songs on all the records. A lot of the rest of the set is just kind of our favorites from the week, stuff that we like to play. Some stuff we played a lot, some stuff we haven't played very much."
14) When You Wake Up Feeling Old (repeat)
"We're gonna rock the shit outta these songs," Jeff said in response to someone in the audience yelling, "Rock that shit!"
"Orchestrated pop tunes," he continued, before jumping into
15) Summerteeth (repeat)--when Jeff sang the "Oooo's" at the end, the audience sang the "Aaaah's." "Nice Ahh-ing," he said. "I like that sentence--nice ahh-ings."
16) Jesus, Etc. (repeat)--the return of Andrew Bird! Finally got it on video:

"Thank you Andrew. I'm glad you came back," Jeff told him. "We're gonna play a couple more songs and that's it." Boooo! "You guys know better than that. We're gonna play a couple more songs and then we're going to take a break and then it's gonna be like we opened for ourselves. Then when we come back we'll be like the real deal, we'll be like the real band, we'll like change clothes and it'll probably just be us still, but that's kinda the idea."

17) Walken (repeat)--the first time I ever heard this song, all I could think was Beatlemania! Shilpa leaned over to me and happily said, "This song makes me think of you!" That made me smile. The only song with my name in it is "Letters To Elise" by The Cure, which is not only the most depressing song ever, but I'm pretty sure they wrote it about my life circa 2002/03. So it's nice to know that such a catchy, Beatles-inspired, fun tune reminds my friend of me over that other one.
18) Hummingbird (repeat)

During the break, Shilpa went to get us cups of water, while Lindsay and I discussed how we felt we were amidst a frat party. All we kept hearing was "HEINEKEN! AMSTEL! BUD!" I felt like informing these popped-collar idiots that Dave Matthews Band was actually playing in Wrigleyville--i.e. where the graduated population of my former high school resides.
When Shilpa returned, we had someone behind us take this picture before we got even sweatier.

Wilco came back with a repeat favorite
19) Via Chicago (repeat)--during which I turned to Shilpa and said, "This feels so good between my legs," in reference to the cup of water. I was serious but then she made me laugh by insisting I write in my book that I said that. Which then prompted my follow-up, "That's what she said," in my persistent ode to Michael Scott of The Office. "Pretty unpleasant," Lindsay said, regarding the blinding light display.

20) Blood Of The Lamb--never heard of it

"We're gonna have to do this again next year," Jeff said, which caused expected amounts of wild cheering. "Because I don't think we're going to get to everything." Collective Awwwwww. "We'll get to everything on the Wilco records but not everything on the Mermaid Avenue records, not all the B sides. We never promised that--look on your ticket! In fact, I don't think there's any promises on there. So next year we'll make some broader promise, since we know all these now. We'll do Dark Side Of The Moon one night." People yelling things. "Well you know what--you can submit your suggestions to the suggestion box...On your way out." Haha cause we're gone for good then-clever, Jeff. "Help us serve you better."

21) Can't Stand It (repeat)--I forgot to write it down?
22) Box Full Of Letters (repeat)--yay! I got to hear it again!
"I apologize for messing up the lyrics on that song," Jeff said. "And really quickly I'd like to blame my wife. Because she still calls that song 'Box Full of Lecords.' Because I had to play it on the radio one time and I messed it up and she's never forgiven me. 17 years. So I looked up and I saw her and I thought, 'Oh she's thinking this is a box full of lecords' so then I sang 'a box full of lecords.' See how that works? Sorry guys," he directed towards his fellow band members.

23) Heavy Metal Drummer (repeat)--I forgot to write this one down too?? What the hell.
24) Hate It Here (5 for 5--really?)

"Warning, warning. This next song might require some overly-optimistic singing along, call and response. Just an alert.
25) The Thanks I Get (repeat)--after the call and response of "We can make it better," Jeff asked, "Can you make it better? You have to stand up and sing to make it better. You have to make an ass out of yourself to make it better...that's right." Then back to the call and response.
26) Just A Kid--I had never heard this one but judging by the lyrics guessed correctly that this was Wilco's contribution to the Spongebob Squarepants movie soundtrack.

"You guys still having a good time?" Happy whistles!
27) Red-Eyed And Blue (repeat)--got the whistle duet with Andrew Bird on video!

28) I Got You (repeat)
29) Casino Queen (repeat)--the guy standing next to Shilpa was an air-guitar maniac and gyrated his body like nothing I've ever seen. We all watched him in pure amazement.
30) I'm A Wheel (repeat)
31) Less Than You Think--Tweedy's voice sounded strained at this point. And don't worry, they did play about ten minutes worth of the feedback found on the A Ghost Is Born recording. One by one they exited the stage and waved as the sounds kept playing...Tweedy, then Sansone, then Stirrat, then Cline, then Kotche...I missed Jorgensen's exit.

Encore:
32) I'm The Man Who Loves You (repeat)--what? No wife shout-out?

"Thank you everybody. Thanks to the Riviera for letting us live here for a week. Thanks for spoiling us for the rest of tour."
33) Dreamer In My Dreams (repeat)--videoed the end

"That's it, that's it," Jeff said. "Goodnight everyone. Thanks again. We'll do this again next year, ok?" Ok, JT, whatever you say. I'm just glad I got to experience the debut of the residency idea.
We went outside and I asked Shilpa to take my picture under the marquee (see beginning of post). I proudly displayed two jazz hands above my head, partly from my years of posing like that in dance photos, but more so to show, 5! I went to ALL 5! Quite an accomplishment.
We then asked a girl standing near us if she'd take a picture of all three of us standing under the marquee. She was not a happy camper and kept insisting she couldn't get all of us in the frame, nor could she figure out what button to push...there's one button. Here's the result:

As we headed to the car, I screeched and pointed at the sky. The end of the lunar eclipse (which began during the concert) was still visible--the last one until 2010. A winning night, the conclusion of the residency and a natural phenomenon. I started singing Wilco's "Far Far Away"..."Far, far away/From those city lights/That might be shining on you tonight/Far, far away from you/On the dark side of the moon...."
5 nights
160 songs
approx. 15 hours
What happens tomorrow night? I wondered. Well, until we meet again, thank you for five nights of brilliance.
ALL PHOTOS
ALL VIDEOS
I randomly came across this person's blog, where she posted tonight's show in its entirety, available for download--enjoy!

Wilco Winter Residency, Day 4, I Must Be High (On Wilco), a.k.a. Obama-Tweedy'08

As promised, Amy and Steve (who looks remarkably like the guy who originally got me into Wilco), my new friends I met at Monday night's show, saved me a seat (and the same exact one!), which was really nice because I was running a lot later this evening, and if it wasn't for them, probably would have ended up crammed in the back of the dance floor crowd.
I talked with Amy about Wilco/Jeff Tweedy solo shows we've both attended, which amounts to at least three (unless you count these 5, then at least 8).

"They've always been our Chicago band," Lin Brehmer of XRT declared while standing center stage. "Wherever they go, they always come home." (Unlike another well-known Chicago-based band who planned an entire tour without coming to Chicago...(*ahem*-smashing pumpkins)

1) Outta Mind (Outta Site)--(sort of a repeat, but the mellower version, which is not the same as the one they've already played...which is a mistake on my part...the version they have played already was "Outta Site (Outta Mind)" Oops.)
2) I Must Be High--funny because I was just going to comment about how I feel like I'm sitting in a marijuana bubble. I also feel like I've been on a Wilco/music high for the past five days.
3) Impossible Germany (4 for 4)

4) Radio Cure--my mind took an unintentional trip back in time during this song, to the year 2002 when someone i thought i loved wrote a line from this in a letter...except he got a crucial word wrong...He wrote "Distance has a way of making love understandable" when, in fact, the lyric is: Distance has NO way of making love understandable...which is ironic because his version made it seem like he was trying to tell me in Wilco-code that we could make things work, whereas that turned out to be his exact opposite sentiment...come back, come back from the past and focus on the present...

5) Leave Me Like You Found Me--people around me are clapping, but not for the song, for the people in the rows ahead of them taking a seat instead of blocking everyone else's view
"That's the first time we've played that song. Outside the studio," Jeff said. (I thought he meant in the last 4 nights) "It's always nice to audition a song in front of such a large listening audience--and on the radio. Did it sound ok?" YEAH! "Ok, moving right along..."

6) Company In My Back--I've always loved this line, "Hide your soft skin/Your sorrow is sunshine/Listen to my eyes/They're hissing radiator tunes..."
"I don't know if can say that [referring to the repetitive use of "holy shit"] on the radio," Jeff said at the end of the song. "Oh well...that might be a hef-ty fine." Then he addressed his sons at home. "If you're still listening, go to bed." He looked at his watch. "Ok, it's still early. You can listen a little longer...but don't pay attention."

7) Handshake Drugs (repeat)--"I was chewin' gum for something to do/The blinds were being pulled down on the dew/Inside, out of love, what a laugh/I was looking for you"
Here's a clip:

8) War On War--I'm just gonna go ahead and say that Yankee Hotel Foxtrot still qualifies as my all-time favorite album (post-Beatles era)
9) Shake It Off--another favorite off SBS, everyone cheered when Tweedy sang, "So many hearts beating in one place." I called Lindsay and left her a voicemail because she wanted to hear this song at Saturday's show.

"So did a lot of you wait around in the cold today?" Jeff asked. "You guys are in-sane." Someone yelled out "Thank you!" but I didn't know why. Then Jeff responded, "You're welcome. That was John's idea. I was against it. I said, 'Give them coffee and they're gonna want donuts.' Did you like the coffee and hot chocolate?" Oh, ok, I understand now. "Good. You're welcome. I'm saying that on air so everyone knows...how much we care," Jeff continued. "We're going to play a few songs off an album that will hopefully warm you up...Oh my god I'm the worst," he said, self-mockingly. "Ok, here's Summerteeth..."

10) Summerteeth

Some feedback. "Excuse me," Jeff joked.
11) In A Future Age
12) ELT (repeat)
13) Shot In The Arm (repeat)

14) Poor Places
15) Reservations--I thought I had never heard this song live, but I just looked back at my old set lists from the first few times I saw them back in '02/'03 and I have...just not in awhile
transitioned right into
16) Spiders (Kidsmoke) (repeat)--since this was not only a repeat but is also about ten minutes long, I decided to run down and take a "pee break" before the designated intermission. While down there, I listened to my voicemail:

"Hi this is Alyse-I can't get to the phone right now because I'm hanging out with Wilco!" Jenny tricked me again! Back in 2004 when Lindsay and I spent a whole night with Wilco&Co. after their Radio City performance in NYC, I left Jenny a drunken message from their hotel bar bathroom and she, in turn, left that message for me...but she sounded just like me, and it took me awhile to figure out she can just imitate me dead-on. She left the same message tonight and it confused me again! Hilarious.

When I got back, they were still playing the same song. Then Jeff said, "We're gonna play one song after this and then take a break. You guys keep clapping so they can hear you at home." The claps and cheering got louder as they finally concluded "Spiders."
"Because I have the opportunity to speak to more people than just you, I'd like to thank those who've come to all five shows..." (but we're here, Jeff, and it's only #4) "...and to the city of Chicago for making our lives...wonderful (or beautiful?)." Then making fun of himself for clearly being a cheeseball, he said, "Oh my god..."

17) On And On And On--most depressing song on SBS

During the break Amy and Steve left to get some air. I stayed in my seat, stared at people, took a crappy picture of the ceiling

and thought to myself, "I wonder what they're playing on the radio during the break...."

"Hello. Welcome back," Jeff greeted us and the XRT audience.
18) Hotel Arizona (repeat)

"It's really great to play on the radio and promote our first two albums." Everyone laughed. "...Since we didn't get to the first time. I'm just kidding--XRT would have let us--they've been with us from the start--the only radio to support Wilco."
I thought of the radio station's ads around the city that read, "Chicago without XRT would be..." asking for listeners to submit their comparisons on their website. Chicago without XRT would be like the world without Wilco.
19) Too Far Apart (repeat)-- check out the video clip. I finally recorded some of Tweedy's wittiness, as he asked, "Can you do that? I'm not gonna go for it that hard--it's the radio--that'd be silly."

20) (Was I) In Your Dreams
"Thank you gentleman," Tweedy directed towards the horn section. "They'll be back--the Total Prose...Daaaaa Total Prose." Hahahaha for those who don't get that, let me put a voice to the phrase. Picture Chris Farley dressed in a Bears jersey saying, "Daaaa Bears" on SNL.

21) Misunderstood (repeat)--rousing "I'd like to thank you all for nothin' nothin' nothin' nothin' NOTHIN' NOTHIN' NOTHIN' (x10)...for nothin' at all"
22) Someday Soon
23) California Stars--called Pat and left a message because he loves this song

"So Obama won Wisconsin?" Mad cheering. "So the Total Prose are back."
24) Hate It Here (4 for 4)
"You guys sound good," Tweedy informed TP. "Even if you have grenadine down the front of your shirt." One of the horn players mimed being embarrassed. "He spilled his Shirley Temple."

25) The Thanks I Get--excellent SBS outtake. After the call and response "We can make it better (we can make it better)," Tweedy said, "It's not silly to sing along. And it's not silly to want to make it better. Ok maybe a little--but it feels so good. Some times you gotta give a damn." That's going to be my new motto. Thanks, Jeff. "Yeah, Obama can use that any time he likes." Hell yeah!
Back in December I went to an Obama rally in this same venue called, "Change Rocks," in which Wilco played a few songs and introduced our future president (yeah, i said it). This was the third time I saw Obama speak (the first was when he was on Conan with Wilco in Chicago in May of '06--unfortunately i have no pictures of this and the second was this past September when I happened to be in NYC during a rally in Washington Square Park) and the more I hear him talk, the more I want him to be president. At the end of the Change Rocks event, I said to my friend Amy, "If he takes Jeff Tweedy as his VP, I'm sold."
Anyway, back to Wilco. Jeff continued, "He [Obama] probably doesn't have any use for the part about getting crazy." He then imitated Obama, "Every time I go out and play..." then "Oh, campaign liability..."

26) Walken (4 for 4)

"I love you Susie."
27) I'm The Man Who Loves You (4 for 4)
28) I'm A Wheel--complete with Tweedy's famous screeching (how does he keep doing that without blowing his voice??) as well as Pat Sansone's animated guitar strumming with full windmill arm circles.

"We're trying to avoid the tired ritual of encores as much as we can--you know, walking off and back on stage," Jeff said. "Actually we're just lazy. When we're done, we want to be done." People cheered, and rightly so. I never really understood the encore concept. "Now, do they get XRT in Pekin [Illinois]? Ok, this goes out to Pekin."
29) Kingpin (repeat)--because the lyrics go, "I wanna be your kingpin/livin' in Pekin"
"How can I?" Woo!
Building on the audience's enthusiastic, "Woos!" Jeff commented on how they like to "start tours in their home town and then put up with the lame audiences everywhere else." Of course I feel a burst of home town pride, but at the same time he might have wanted to save that comment for when he wasn't being broadcast worldwide. Although, I do have to say, he's right, at least as far at Austin goes. I saw them perform at Austin City Limits last September, and I felt like I (along with a few friends) was the only one going nuts, singing along, jumping up and down, etc. And in response, Jeff hardly spoke to the boring audience and although they sounded great, there was a definite lack of enthusiasm.

(photo taken by Lisa Nicholson at ACL '07)

(photo taken by Shilpa Anturkar at ACL '07, and yes that's the famous blue notebook in hand)

"What should we do?" Jeff lamented to his fellow Chicagoans. "Take you with us. Actually a lot of you probably will. And that's scary."

30) Outta Site (Outta Mind) (repeat)--we've come full circle
With a wave of his hand and rub of his eye, JT thanked the audience and Wilco left the stage. "Peaches" by Pres. of U.S.A. played yet again. And yet again I sang along. There was a stagehand adjusting the instruments who kept lifting his hands in the air, signaling us to continue clapping/cheering.
It worked. They came back. (shocking, i know)
31) The Late Greats (repeat)
"Thank you very much," Jeff waved goodbye. "That's gotta be it. See you tomorrow night."

I said thanks again for the seat to Amy and Steve and then skated my way down the thickly-iced sidewalks of Lawrence Avenue until I found my car on one of the side streets. Only one night left...